Insomnia...grief, and the trials of life...

[Gary2112]

I feel like I'm on a roller coaster these days. After the death of my sister, I got news that a close friend and co-worker in the Fire Service passed away. Being on the dept. Honor Guard, I was assigned to guard the casket during the services. Doing that, along with work, and other things I feel totally drained.

Sleep has not come easy, and when it does I feel more exhausted for doing so. My 24 inch gauge has helped keep me true, but my cable tow has felt like a noose at times. I've been so busy, I think my Lodge is wondering if they'll ever see me again. Sigh... I need sleep! :1-sleep:

 

[removed12612]

Bro....first of all I am sorry to hear of the loss of a your friend .... I am sure it has been a rough time.

Just remember, you need to make some time for Gary to maintain the health of Gary....

As for the Lodge..... they will be fine.... during this time, they are out of the length of your cable tow.... and rightly so..... I am sure they will understand and would tell you to dont even worry about them....

If I can do anything let me know.

 

[Gary2112]

Thanks Brother. I'm hanging in there, but it is certainly a trial of my limits. Masonry has been the balance. If it weren't for me having my Brothers keeping me on my feet, I could easily fall into despair.

It's when the going gets tough that I really dig in, and embrace the Craft. At first my experience with it was daunting and frustrating. It's through Masonic discourse that I have found my respite.

The Lodge can wait for me, but I miss my Lodge!

 

[jaya]

Brother my prayers are with you. Take time for yourself. Your lodge, as well as the brethren as a whole, are there for you. You must find rest or you will go nuts. Take care of yourself and family. The rest will happen.

 

[Duncan1574]

Try Excedrin PM to help you sleep.

I an sympathize with your stress. We have had 3 people at work lose their Fathers in the past month and one Department Supervisor just had a double mastectomy yesterday. A friend and Brother from our village just had a cancerous tumor removed from his left hand, his second tumor in a year.

To paraphrase an old adage: GAOTU will not give you more than you can stand.

 

[Bob Franks]

Brother Gary-
Seriously, if your sleep and ability to rest are affected, please seek professional help. It does not have to involve medication [Holy Cow! They're gonna kick me outa the Union for saying that], a good counselor-a psychologist, social worker, or licensed professional counselor, may help you through this. If your religious leader is professionally trained, you may benefit from regular scheduled sessions with him(/her).
Just as a professional personal coach can help you with your physical strength and endurance, a mental health professional can help you with the load you are carrying in your heart.

 

[Gary2112]

Brother Gary-
Seriously, if your sleep and ability to rest are affected, please seek professional help. It does not have to involve medication [Holy Cow! They're gonna kick me outa the Union for saying that], a good counselor-a psychologist, social worker, or licensed professional counselor, may help you through this. If your religious leader is professionally trained, you may benefit from regular scheduled sessions with him(/her).
Just as a professional personal coach can help you with your physical strength and endurance, a mental health professional can help you with the load you are carrying in your heart.

Bro. Bob,

I was diagnosed with PTSD some time ago, and have a good therapist that works with me when necessary. If it keeps up I'll make an appointment to see her. I lead a CISM team for my department, and some of my team members have worked with me to diffuse the initial symptoms.

I've dealt with this before, so it's nothing new. It's just exhausting. Fortunately I've learned some positive ways to deal with stress. Like I said before, I use Masonry as one of those behavior modifications. The research really helps me focus. It's just when my subconscious mind kicks in, that there are issues. I've also learned to be vocal about how I'm feeling and that has helped quite a bit.

Considering what's happened in the last couple of weeks, I think I've dealt with the stress pretty well. Especially when I reflect on the way I reacted to stress prior to learning about my condition.

 

[Bob Franks]

Brother Gary-
Sounds like you have a lot of the tools you need to work with, but if stress is overwhelming, maybe a tune-up is called for.
I love it that you already have a relationship with a therapist.

my heart is with you, my Brother!

S&F

 

[Gary2112]

Brother Gary-
Sounds like you have a lot of the tools you need to work with, but if stress is overwhelming, maybe a tune-up is called for.
I love it that you already have a relationship with a therapist.

my heart is with you, my Brother!

S&F

One doesn't work in my profession for as long as I have, and survive without one! LOL

 

[Bob Franks]

One doesn't work in my profession for as long as I have, and survive without one! LOL

Ooooh!
Guess I'm in a less stressful job...


S&F

 

[jason]

The most beautiful people we have known are those who have known defeat, kown suffering, known struggle, known loss, and have found their way out of the depths. These persons have an appreciation, a sensitivity, and an understanding of life that fills them with compassion, gentleness, and a deep loving concern.

Elizabeth Ros.


I have a sleep meditation mp3 someone sent me. It works sometimes, sometimes I have to listen to it back to back. And sometimes, nothing works. But I can e-mail it to you if you wish.

 

[Zack]

I start reciting one of the lectures and it seems to work most of the time. lol

 

[Duncan1574]

I must not fear.
Fear is the mind-killer.
Fear is the little-death that brings total obliteration.
I will face my fear.
I will permit it to pass over me and through me.
And when it has gone past I will turn the inner eye to see its path.
Where the fear has gone there will be nothing.
Only I will remain.

Works for several conditions: stress, ID-10Ts, grieve.

As to grieve my standard advise is this: Grieve is personal, there is no 'right' way to do it, people may chide you for to grieving 'right', tell them to bugger off.

BTW- Today is my Dad's birthday he passed 3 years ago, Mom has been gone almost 10, so I need that litany today.