I'm pleading the 5th on this one.
1. You will never play professional basketball.
2. You swear very well.
3. At least one of your cousins is a fireman, cop, bar owner, funeral home owner or holds political office. And you have at least one aunt who is a nun or uncle who's a priest.
4. You think you sing very well.
5. You have no idea how to make a long story short!
6. There isn't a big difference between you losing your temper or killing someone!
7. Many of your childhood meals were boiled. Instant potatoes were a mortal sin.
8. You have never hit your head on a ceiling.
9. You spent a good portion of your childhood kneeling in the Confessional repenting for sins you committed, sins you thought about committing, sins you heard about committing, sins you never knew were sins, and sins which consisted of thinking about committing sins including eating meat on Friday.
10. You're strangely poetic after a few beers.
11. Some punches directed at you are from legacies of past generations.
12. Many of your sisters and/or cousins are named Mary, Catherine or Eileen and there is a least one member of your family with a full name of Mary Catherine Eileen.
13. Someone in your family is very generous. It is more than likely you.
14. You may not know the words but that doesn't stop you from singing.
15. You can't wait for the other guy to stop talking before you start talking.
16. You're not nearly as funny as you think you are but what you lack in talent you make up for in frequency.
17. There wasn't a huge difference between your last wake and your last keg party.
18. You are, or know someone, named Murph.
19. If you don't know Murph then you know Mac. If you don't know Murph or Mac then you know Sully and you probably are McMurphy!
20. You are genetically incapable of keeping a secret whilst under the influence of Messrs. O'Hopps & McBarley.
21. You have Irish Alzheimer's - you forget everything but the grudges!
22. "Irish Stew" is a euphemism for "boiled leftovers".
23. Your skin's ability to tan .. not so much (Only in spots!)
24. Childhood remedies for the common cold often included some form of whiskey.
25. There's no one leaving a family party without saying goodbye for at least 45 minutes.
26. At this very moment, you have a least two relatives who are not speaking to each other. Not fighting, mind you, just not speaking
to each other whilst consistently having detailed audible heated discourse
with themselves about the other (and one of them is always you).
27. At the risk of being referred to as a "Heathen", you begin celebrating St. Paddys' Day
in January, alternate between pretending you are a set of Bagpipes and singing Danny Boy
at the March Parades, and continue celebrating through the summer at the beach becoming a
"lobster with a silly grin", through the splendid Fall Foliage Season, and play Santa in December
all the while getting ready to celebrate St. Paddys' in January once again (hereditary rituals die hard).
1. You will never play professional basketball.
2. You swear very well.
3. At least one of your cousins is a fireman, cop, bar owner, funeral home owner or holds political office. And you have at least one aunt who is a nun or uncle who's a priest.
4. You think you sing very well.
5. You have no idea how to make a long story short!
6. There isn't a big difference between you losing your temper or killing someone!
7. Many of your childhood meals were boiled. Instant potatoes were a mortal sin.
8. You have never hit your head on a ceiling.
9. You spent a good portion of your childhood kneeling in the Confessional repenting for sins you committed, sins you thought about committing, sins you heard about committing, sins you never knew were sins, and sins which consisted of thinking about committing sins including eating meat on Friday.
10. You're strangely poetic after a few beers.
11. Some punches directed at you are from legacies of past generations.
12. Many of your sisters and/or cousins are named Mary, Catherine or Eileen and there is a least one member of your family with a full name of Mary Catherine Eileen.
13. Someone in your family is very generous. It is more than likely you.
14. You may not know the words but that doesn't stop you from singing.
15. You can't wait for the other guy to stop talking before you start talking.
16. You're not nearly as funny as you think you are but what you lack in talent you make up for in frequency.
17. There wasn't a huge difference between your last wake and your last keg party.
18. You are, or know someone, named Murph.
19. If you don't know Murph then you know Mac. If you don't know Murph or Mac then you know Sully and you probably are McMurphy!
20. You are genetically incapable of keeping a secret whilst under the influence of Messrs. O'Hopps & McBarley.
21. You have Irish Alzheimer's - you forget everything but the grudges!
22. "Irish Stew" is a euphemism for "boiled leftovers".
23. Your skin's ability to tan .. not so much (Only in spots!)
24. Childhood remedies for the common cold often included some form of whiskey.
25. There's no one leaving a family party without saying goodbye for at least 45 minutes.
26. At this very moment, you have a least two relatives who are not speaking to each other. Not fighting, mind you, just not speaking
to each other whilst consistently having detailed audible heated discourse
with themselves about the other (and one of them is always you).
27. At the risk of being referred to as a "Heathen", you begin celebrating St. Paddys' Day
in January, alternate between pretending you are a set of Bagpipes and singing Danny Boy
at the March Parades, and continue celebrating through the summer at the beach becoming a
"lobster with a silly grin", through the splendid Fall Foliage Season, and play Santa in December
all the while getting ready to celebrate St. Paddys' in January once again (hereditary rituals die hard).
